Then laid they their hands on them, and they received the Holy
Ghost.
And when Simon saw that through laying on of the apostles' hands
the Holy Ghost was given, he offered them money,
Saying, Give me also this power, that on whomsoever I lay hands,
he may receive the Holy Ghost.
But Peter said unto him, Thy money perish with thee, because
thou hast thought that the gift of God may be purchased with money.
Thou hast neither part nor lot in this matter: for thy heart is
not right in the sight of God.
Repent therefore of this thy wickedness, and pray God, if
perhaps the thought of thine heart may be forgiven thee.
Money can’t buy me love. Or can it?
What is the experience of love if not a pleasant
feeling of belonging and satisfaction? I
can purchase feelings of pleasure: massages, fast cars, ice cream cones, teddy
bear sheets, or a trip to the amusement park.
I can purchase a feeling of belonging: memberships to a gym or celebrity
fan club, or the novel or handful of coupons that get me into the book club or
coupon trading circle. And I can
purchase a feeling of satisfaction: home improvement, pizza delivered to me
whenever I have a craving, or the perfect outfit that makes my classmates
envious at the reunion. If love is the ultimate
of feelings, then it, too, can surely be acquired through money. Maybe I can’t technically purchase a person,
but… If I have a lot of money, then I can find people I like and buy them pleasures
and satisfactions. They will therefore
love being with me and praise me for giving them such great gifts, thus
deepening my feelings of pleasure, satisfaction, and belonging – for we will
share a life of enjoyment together for as long as those good feelings last. And when the pleasant feelings end, I will
simply find new ones. What more can we
ask of love?
Isn’t that true?
No.
First, we overuse the word love. I love ice cream cones, I love discussing
books with other people, and I love a well decorated house. But, when I say that I love God… This is
something else entirely. Our overused
word of “love” is utterly insufficient to express what exists between me and
the Creator and Master of the Universe.
I don’t like God to an extreme degree or intensity. It is not enough even to say that I have a
positive feeling toward God. To know Him
is to love Him. Not because He is so
wonderfully likable or because He does such delightful favors for me. This love for God, this love of God, is
beyond anything that I experience in an earthly way. And God’s love for me… There are no words to
describe it. So, for now, for here, I’m
going to call this love Love.
To my second point: Love isn’t a feeling. I said that to know God is to Love God. To be in any mindful kind of way in the
presence of God is to experience Love… I don’t even want to use the word
experience… it is to Love. I have heard
it said that Love is a choice. And I
agree. Love is an act of will, it is not
simply something that we feel or that we experience in a happening kind of way. Love doesn’t come serendipitously to us and
we don’t find Love out in the world – no matter what romance novels may
say. Rather, true Love is. And we either do it or we don’t. And it has absolutely nothing to do with
money or health or influence or fame or even likability. The poorest of humans can Love the most
richly. And Love has nothing to do with
how we feel. In fact, you know that you
truly Love if you are doing it when you don’t feel like doing it at all.
And what are you doing? If Love is something that we do, what is it
that we do? We are simply opened up and
giving ourselves always and everywhere.
And, no, not giving our bodies for other people’s pleasures. That’s not Love. Rather, we know ourselves, we know the truth
of who we are, images of God, and we share this truth, this reality of our
being, with ourselves, with God, with every person that we meet, with the
world. Do I mean evangelize? Yeah, sure – but in the sense that the words
that we choose to speak, just like the actions that we choose to take, are so
at one with the reality of who we are, that the truth simply, naturally, flows
forth from us to others. So, the first question
to ask, when pondering Love, is, Who am I?
I am goodness, I am truth, I am kindness, I am generosity, I am mercy, I
am strength, I am gentleness, I am Love – because I am the image of God, as
created by God. This is who I am. It is only when I am truly myself that I am
truly able to Love. For when I am truly myself… then I truly Love.
You have heard it said that God is Love. Let me try to explain that further. God is the free gift of self. That is Love.
To think that this is something that we could actually buy with money? …As if it were some perishable thing, some
fleeting feeling… And as if what is inherently free could ever be up for sale,
could ever be possessed – it cannot, for Love can only be given and Love can
only be received by giving it away…
Christina Chase
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